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Bridging the Perspective Gap

Real estate closings are a transactional business. While unexpected obstacles and unique circumstantial challenges invariably pop up, the major tenets and milestones are mostly the same from closing to closing. It is natural then, for those of us that work in the real estate industry to attempt to build processes, create systems, and delegate to a team, to find efficiencies in how we deliver our services. As each of us look to grow our business, the emphasis shifts towards consistency, making sure that nothing ‘falls through the cracks’.

On the other hand, most of our clients are not buying a real estate closing – they are buying a home, and they’re paying real estate professionals to guide them and protect them through that stressful and treacherous journey. Many of them have never bought a house before, nor have they witnessed the process first-hand. They’ve saved tens to thousands of dollars to take this step, and in most cases, they have no idea if they’re making the best or worst decision on behalf of their families.

The impact of this divide in perspective is not catastrophic, but it is significant. It affects how we communicate with our clients, it lessens potential conflicts, and it influences whether clients refer our services to their friends and family in the future. Those that are able to narrow the distance between the two perspectives, that can maximize empathy in our process, will not only see their business grow, but may find more meaning and satisfaction in the work.

The Divide Is Not Catastrophic, But It Is Significant.

To be fair – empathy is not easy. It’s a muscle that requires the commitment of time and energy to strengthen. Below are five suggestions on how to practice bridging the perspective gap

1. Commit to picking up the phone.

Email is a productivity-boosting tool like no other, but it does have one downfall - it is a black hole of human connection. Commit to picking up the phone and connecting to clients by voice. -if even for a couple minutes to build initial trust and rapport. Starting off with a feeling of trust and connection will pay back dividends even if future correspondences are via email.

2. In times of conflict - stop saying ‘I’.

When we feel attacked, disrespected, or just stressed, we have a natural tendency to fall back into survival mode. Our worldview becomes narrower. Even in small conflicts, like a client haggling us on price, our natural inclination is to retreat into our own perspective, “I deserve my fee,” “he doesn’t know how much work I put in,” etc. Rather, try to adopt a “he” voice. “He is looking for value,” “he is just trying to cut down the closing costs,”. While the conflict may exist, this allows for a more productive and collaborative resolution.

3. Be a better listener.

This is the number one empathy-generating skill, but it sure is a difficult skill to master. To help, come up with a list of three open-ended questions that you can fall back on to make sure you’re listening more than talking. Alternatively - on my monitor, I have a post-it that reads, “Shut up”.

4. Take care of yourself.

This might seem counter-intuitive, but we retreat to our primal mode of thinking when we are tired, stressed, uncomfortable, or otherwise ill-at-ease. As such, the more we take care of ourselves, or admit to ourselves that we are in a compromised state, the better equipped we are to deal with outside interactions.

5. Build the relationship.

Our clients may never need our services again, but just because the business interaction is transactional, the personal relationship doesn’t have to be. Take the time to care about this person, his family, and their experience. Take a picture with them on closing day or hand-write and send a card to them on their closing anniversary. No matter how busy you are, give them a warm handshake and ‘thank-you’ when they leave.

When things get really busy it is easy to think of each transaction as exactly that – just a transaction. However, I hope that at least one of these tips helps you to refocus — to your clients, this may very well be the most important purchase of their lives.

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